mixed up feeling

finally it has stopped raining now. n cuaca pun nyaman dan sejuk je and of course, perasaan pun akan rs nyaman.. but im not! xtau nape, ptg2 yg sejuk n best cmni, ad 1 perasaan yg x best. i dont know how to describe it. heartless? nope! numb?? yes, i guess "numb" is the right word to describe my feeling right now.

ntah la, tibe2 rs takut sume yg di plan xkn jadi. im not indicating on a specific plans, but plan2 yg mmg dh dirancang b4 nih.. (ayat pun dh x btul dh nih).. tbe2 terpk, mcm mane kalo sume yg dirancang x jdik, dan xkn jdik smpi bile2, smpi mase yg aku sndiri pun x tau bile..

and tbe2 terpk, rs sedih sgt tgok org lain dh achieve diorg pnye dream, and i cannot stop wondering whether my dream will be as good ad theirs, or even better?

hmm... hari yg x best utk aku hari ni...